Hey Cripple Dave ...

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Jun 05, 2020, 09:10

Tell me something, Cripple Dave ... are you fat?

The last pic I saw of you showed evidence of obesity setting in. Remember, you still had an empty plate on your knee?

Is that why you’re spraining your wrist and wobbling down the block now? Trying to lose a little weight?


Well ... I know you have a gammy leg ... and that it causes you severe pain ... and because of it, you now live on painkillers. You’ve probably developed an addiction to them.

Let me see ... you spend most of your day off your feet ... and as time passed you by, you ended up picking masses of weight up ... which just aggravated the foot even more, making things a lot worse.

Your wife saw your disgusting condition and told you to get some exercise in.

Does that sound about right?

So ... you decide to hit the weights ... but ... seeing as you’ve never done a simple sit-up in your life, you went in totally ignorant and ended up spraining your weedy wrist.

You’re wife then suggested going for a walk ... and said she’d walk with you. So off you wobbled, all loaded up on painkillers, using her to support you  ... determined to walk to the end of the bock and back (200m) ... only to arrive back home 2 and a half hours later, half dead, covered in sweat.

That’s when you told Mozart how you hit the weights for 2 and half hours every day ... and that you follow it up with a 2 and half hour wobble ... errr ... I mean shuffle  .. err ... I mean walk ... everyday.

As is usually the case ... you left a few things out, didn’t you Cripple Dave?

As I said ... you just can’t help yourself. Lying is all you know.


What I find even more hilarious is that you got wifey dearest to bring you your laptop and while in bed on your back, you threatened Shezza with a beating ... calling him a girl and whatever else.

Tell me something, HopAlong  ... what were you going to beat him with? Your walking stick?

No, Cripple Dave ... I won’t be accepting any olive branch from you, no matter what you cover it in.

You are a sad little man.

I will however give you a little advice ... losing weight starts in the kitchen. It's pointless going for a 2 and a half hour wobble if you're still stuffing your face with pies and pizza.

Jun 05, 2020, 09:56

Dumb Cunt professing to know so much about me but actually knows fuck all

At least Chip got close with Tesco

You could not hit a cows arse with a banjo - you are too fucking dumb

Am I fat - not even close, am I a cripple not even close. I have an irritating dull ache in my left leg which mostly gravitates to my knee thanks to an old cricket injury. I equate the pain to lactic acid build up, it could be that for all I know. The leg is having to work extra hard because of the disc issue. To be honest I don’t know.

I’m in fucking good condition for a 50 year old. Cardio is great and with the weight training 6 days a week I’m in good shape and feeling good. Pain killer addiction bwhaaahaa - I probably remember to take them about 3 times a week before a shuffle

I don’t have a block to walk around - I live out in the country you stupid twat

The only lies here are everything you have said about me. Not a single bit of your assertions are true not even close.

I live a privileged life, don’t need to work anymore but I have my own business to keep me out of trouble- can exercise when I want and for as long as I want. That includes walking, running/shuffle, weights and kayaking down my river.

Best of all I’m really really good looking and the ladies love me!!!

Jun 05, 2020, 10:23

“  Best of all I’m really really good looking and the ladies love me!!!

James Todd Smith (born January 14, 1968), better known by his stage name LL Cool J (short for Ladies Love Cool James),

Jun 05, 2020, 11:11

"Pain killer addiction bwhaaahaa - I probably remember to take them about 3 times a week before a shuffle."

There's a documentary called Prescription Thugs.

I recommend it. Here's the trailer.

Jun 05, 2020, 11:12

These thread titles are hilarious BTW :angel:

Jun 05, 2020, 11:32


Jun 07, 2020, 12:33

I'll say this much, there was a time I was doing an hour of hardcore weights in the morning, another hour to an hour and a half in the afternoon, and them swimming around 2km's, 6 days a week. It lasted just under a month and I suddenly got bloody sick and kakked off badly. I am convinced I over trained, and my body just packed up. I was in my mid 20's at the time. Saffman, If you are able to do a similar routine, even a little less, in your 50's, I salute you! No way I would ever train like that again. 

Jun 07, 2020, 17:40

Blue I’ve always enjoyed pushing myself and given I have time on my hands I find it easy to fit the routine in each day

There is no way I’d do it if I was working 9 to 5

I’m not one to wake up early to fit exercise in. I like to go to bed late and wake up when I want to, not when a bloody alarm wakes me. I did 15 years of commuting to London leaving early and getting home late each day. Never again. I loved the buzz when it lasted but by the time I’d decided that there was more to life than chasing the buck I was more than ready for this laid back life I now lead.

Everyday is now a Saturday even when I am working!!

Jun 07, 2020, 17:46

So David, I'll tell you what.
Post a picture of yourself, with your ID as proof (you can hide your ID number and surname).

If you are in decent enough shape, i promise to never speak about your mum ever again.

Cos then clearly she's been lying to me!

And.. I will be man enough to post a full article apologizing to you for calling you fat and bald.

Do we have a deal?

From then on, I will stand by your side in every argument that you have with our resident Aussie Cape Coloured.

Truthfully, it's your quintessential potty mouth that gives me the impression that you are short, fat and bald.

Jun 07, 2020, 18:04

Better still FaceTime or WhatsApp video me at some point. You can then see me in the flesh - in shape, not short or bald

Jun 08, 2020, 00:50


Something that both you and your mum enjoy.

Just that the FaceTime that she enjoys usually occurs in person.

Jun 08, 2020, 01:28

Weak chip chip - it’s weak

You need to go back to the drawing board

Jun 08, 2020, 09:06

Oh ... were you expecting a response from me, Cripple Dave?

My bad. Let me clear the confusion up for you.

You and I both know what you are ... so let’s not pretend that you have principles, or integrity, or that you live your life by a certain code based on anything decent.

That is not how you were raised. Any and all values that your mommy tried to impart was discarded a long time ago and replaced with what we see today ... a lowlife piece of shit.

You are a bullshitter of note ... a compulsive liar ... completely ignorant ... and your life is one big cesspool filled with every perversion known to man.

Now you tell me, Cripple Dave ... why would I want to debate anything with such a person ... when it’s clear, right from the onset, that his only response is just another lie ... another conjured bit of horseshit ... twisted truth ... feeble excuses ... ducking straight forward questions when cornered ... and the use of foul language?

You see my point, Cripple Dave?

So, no ... I didn’t post this thread to have a debate with you. You are an easy read and it certainly isn’t difficult to figure out your response. Sorry my dear HopAlong, but I’ve heard it all before and have no interest in hearing another one of your lies ... or another feeble excuse ... or even the same boring fabricated nonsense.

The truth seems to intimidate you and I guess that’s why you’re always trying to avoid it.

I hope that clears it up now, Cripple Dave?

Enjoy your 2 and a half hour wobble and give my condolences to your lovely wife. If ever she needs the attention of a real man, let me know.


Jun 08, 2020, 10:09

Cunt I’m still waiting for evidence of me lying

Your words are as empty as your fucking brain

You know ZERO about me

Jun 19, 2020, 13:54

All these demands to see pictures of Dave are perplexing. Men wanting pictures of another man! WTH!!!!

Jun 21, 2020, 01:28

Weight training six days a week? There is no way a reasonable program could be sustained six days a week; you'd regress, not improve. Injury ensues. 

Jun 21, 2020, 10:42

Wrong Aug.

4 upper body days

2 leg days

No problem if you're sleeping well and not training for two hours a day.

Also, I doubt Saffex is trying to bench 180Kgs.

My guess, he's doing lots of reps and not lifting to failure.

I don't see any issues there.

Jun 21, 2020, 13:55

Nor do I see any issues. 

You never do a complete workout of everyone muscle group 6 days a week if you have any clue. 

Jun 22, 2020, 00:23

What leg exercise is he going to do that excludes upper body? I don't believe in that at all. 6 days a week? Baloney. At his age, weights wouldn't be kind to his joints and ligaments anyway. There are smarter ways to train. 6 was the typical Saffy route to overstating himself and his greatness. I don't believe he knows how to train. 

Jun 30, 2020, 16:18

It amuses one...the only 2... I think probably are in fair shape is Plum because he is relatively young and has disciplined schedule and CC who turned his health habits around...albeit far too late but with merit...probably to improve his image and I give credit for that. 

I used to do weights when I was young...no programs but simple sets...I was lean and very strong but not into excessive weight ...I did weights to add weight...it never worked because I was never that committed.

But I'm old now and still very strong, love hiking and climbing mountains but got to watch myself...longevity in my family worries me...I don't want to live to 90 or horrors 100...in this sick and buggered world.

Jun 30, 2020, 19:30

Aug I see you are just as ignorant when it comes to exercising as you are rugby

Here is a polite suggestion


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